Awkward

hmm.. awkward.. the first thing that past my head.. just like my life, my heart, and me.. :') i really don't know what am i feeling right now..

I'm happy.. why? i was a burden for her.. and puposely or not I'm ask to leave from her life.. and I'm happy to not anymore become her burden..

BUT

I'm sad.. because I've become a burden to her.. and i left my promises.. and i can't leave you just yet.. until you give me the chance to fulfill my promises to you.. i didn't meant to leave my promises or not to fulfill them..

my promises..

1. to CHANGE
2. to CHANGE
3. to CHANGE

and to change.. it's not really that easy.. maybe in your eyes I'm not doing it.. but to tell you the truth.. I'm doing my best to fulfill that..

and i thought you loved me.. and i realize, your love to me? it's a 50% monkey love.. but if you think that mine is like that. no.. if my love is like that.. i wouldn't do, feel, made all this..

only thing i want now is.. i want to be your friend again.. not this.. now you really hate me.. and i don't know how you forget me cause i can't forget you.. even now, the way how you talked to me? it's not really talking together, more like talking to a robot.. i want the old you back.. only that..

if you still haven't forgive me.. I'm sorry.. I'm sorry.. I'm sorry.. if i can do anything to make you forgive me.. i would do almost anything in my worth to do that.. :')